Just write, write whatever you want

Except don't write about THAT, or definitely not THIS

In fact, don't write at all, I'll only reprimand you

Thank you.

Thank you for not giving me criteria and then getting all pissy when I didn't hand in exactly what you wanted, and thank you for superimposing your belief system on me, even though I have my own thank you very much, oh and THANK you for putting all these little red marks on my paper, they compliment the black and white very nicely.

I'm sorry if this Rant isn't quite to your criteria,

I'm sorry its devoid of any pretty language, or metaphorical garble

I'm sorry if its offensive or guttural or horribly crude.

But this is me, and this is what I think of your stupid standards and your stupid rating systems, all despicable ways of trying to cram me into some rudiment.

I hate it when you tell me that what I've done isn't "good enough" I'm sorry, but I slaved away on it for 3 hours, and I liked it and it was good enough for me until you came along and told me it sucked.

Io love how YOU think you have the right to judge me and my work?

You think you're better than me, don't 'cha?

You KNOW who you are, and you KNOW what goes on in your heads when you see someone like me.

And I KNOW what goes on in there too, you despicable worm.

I'm sorry if I'm a little uncouth in my delivery of this undiluted RAGE but..

Well.. you know what?

I'm tired of being sorry. Sorry for my opinions and thoughts, my likes and dislikes.

Shouldn't I be able to say and think and wear and do whatever the hell I want?

Why should I have to meet up with YOUR standards? I'm sick of blaming me for you're disgust.

You know, just the other day I was laughing with a friend at the bus stop and these 2 dickweeds come up and stand near me and you know what they said?

"oh you're evil, just listen to that laugh"

and at that point I wanted to rip out their tongues and skin their faces with their own fingernails,
 

then later, I thought well, maybe if I harbour thoughts like that, maybe I really am evil?

But does it really matter?

If I want to laugh like an evil overlord or a demonic pixie I should have that right, I mean,  dear RA! Why should you have to critique my Damn laugh?! I want to be able to laugh however the hell I want.

You know, I also wanted to wear a potato sack to grad, you know, instead of an exorbently expensive dress, but hey! Everyone I told in euphoric excitement, shot it down like a jackass with an accompanying argument akin to "you'll insult people; don't do that, it supposed to be a happy time"

Happy, happy, happy, happy

BAM!! I just want to punch them in their stupid sorry faces.

What about MY happy time, jackoff?

So what now? I can't even wear what I want to grad without you bagging on me about it!

I want to show a little bit of me and its WRONG?!?

Of course, I'm not going to do it now, I'm sure you're all breathing again now, if you cared. Which you weren't supposed to.

I don't want to have to deal with all the complaining and bitching from my "friends"

Which is another thing I want to talk about

These stupid people who treat you like crap and still expect you to smile at them in the hallways.

"I'll stick by  you and be a good loyal friend and never leave you no matter what!!

Well.. except if you do THIS… or.. THAT"

I'm sorry if you're still clutching to the whimsical vagary called "dignity" or "pride" or "social status" I know I'm not



"please analyze this story"

okay,  I think its about space aliens sucking his damned brains out through a straw, and hey! I can justify this argument with some well placed quotations.

Well I'm sorry, there was only ONE answer to this highly subjective question, and it was
"the story's about kids going crazy on some Ra forsaken island in the middle of no where, which is a perfect parallel to modern society and blah blah blah blah

well I think it’s a perfect parallel to brain sucking aliens Mr. dumbface.

I'm marked WRONG on a FRIGGING subjective question!!

Essentially a "what do you think" question!

How the hell can you mark my thinking WRONG?

You know what? I think you're marking is WRONG!! I think YOU'RE thinking is WRONG!!

I bet you're going to say my lack of transition here is WRONG too huh?

You know, every foods class, I wanna eat the cake batter, I like the DAMNED batter okay?

Well apparently its not OK

I'll get freaking salmonella, or staphylococcus, or food poisoning, or AIDS or cancer, or skin-eating disease, or ADD or some other made up pile of fodder that's been spoon-fed to all the obedient sheep out there.

If I want to eat the Damn batter, LET me eat the Damn batter!!

Do NOT take the bowl away from me

Do NOT hit me

Do NOT talk down to me

Because one day I will snap,

And you will all fear that day, and rue it when it comes,

You will RUE it I say!!

This is only a fraction of the apocalyptic hatred and anger that I will unleash upon you miserable bottom-dwelling slime suckers

The flood gates will open and my patience will snap and I will laugh however the hell I want and I will write whatever I want and I will wear all the burlap I want, and eat all the cake batter I want!

But until then I suppose I'm stuck bein the semi-snarky pseudo-polite scholar?

So thank you for listening

Thank you for you gracious contribution of time to my mindless whining.

And sorry it wasn’t what you wanted to hear.